i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
