he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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