I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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