I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Blood and glitter go together right?
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Randomize
