he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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