i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
