STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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