i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize