So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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