***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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