I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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