Your mouth is God's brothel.
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
