If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
