btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
I think I am morally bankrupt
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
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