we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Your cock deserves a montage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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