is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
