I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Fuck me I smell like cheese
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize
