How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize