I want to make a zoo with you.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
