I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
