better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
