I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
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I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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