i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
