I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
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