There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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