based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
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