Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
then he tried to convert me to islam
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk