I can tuck mytits in my pants
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.