he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
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