Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
