life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Actions speak louder than pants.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize