And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
