Whoa Z and x make the same sound
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
