Pants 0. Shit 1.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Randomize
