I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
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