google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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