the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
