i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Randomize
