I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
even my farts smell like vagina
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
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