Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
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