I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
