forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
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