So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
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