Can i not drive my cunt home
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
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