What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Randomize
