I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
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