Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
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I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
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I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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