Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
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