If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
