Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
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