i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
We have started to decorate penises.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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